Breaking news: I have over the last few weeks been
reminded that I am not a superhero, that I am just an imperfect male human. In
light of this shocking development in my life, I have come to the conclusion
that I need to rely on outside sources for strength even more. It is a very
humbling thing when you are reminded of this and it is even more humbling when
it is a series of events combined into one life lesson.
On June 17, I had a nerve conduction test, which
involved about six needles at once into my left arm to test how reactive my
nerves are in my arm because I have had a nerve injury for nearly a year now. I
was told that my ulnar nerve on the outside of my left arm now only functions
at 5%, so I have basically lost all feeling and doctors are saying I will not regain
the feeling and it will always be weaker than normal. Do I accept this as my
new standard in life or do I keep going with physio, pain relief and try my
best to try and gain it? Sometimes, you just need to learn to accept the
inevitable, that these people have studied and practiced for years in their
field and know what they are talking about.
Only a few days after this, I left Australia for the
first time as I headed to China on a study tour, totally paid for by my
university. It was an absolutely amazing experience as I got to learn all about
Chinese culture and experience their way of life for 15 days. The Chinese
people are some of the most selfless people I have seen in my life and
hopefully Australians can learn from this because we certainly have room for
improvement in this area. The experience left me feeling vulnerable (according
to our team leader, that was the whole goal of the trip) because I had no idea
how to communicate, how to get anywhere, even how to use chopsticks at first.
Now I could tell you how to get around Tianjin and Beijing, basic language, how
to make Chinese tea, write in Chinese and cook real Chinese food and yes, I can
use chopsticks.
All this has lead me to the thought that we are only
humbled and vulnerable if we allow ourselves to feel that way. Our feelings are
our choice and should not be a result of external factors. But hey, we are
humans and sometimes they will be influenced by other things. There is nothing
wrong with being humbled because sometimes we just need to be knocked down a
few pegs. The important thing here is that we do not let that feeling make us
feel low in ourselves and we just take things on board as learning experiences.
So going back to my title, despite how you feel,
internally or physically, just get up and get on with it because in the end you
will find you have more strength than you thought. On that day I had my nerve
conduction test, I was in crazy amounts of pain and as I live on my own, had to
cook dinner, wash clothes and clean the kitchen. I did it all because in the
end, you realize that you have more strength in you than you know and you may even
surprise yourself just how strong you are, physically or emotionally.
Giving up is not an option,
Perry.
